It was at that point the crowd that gathered realized i wasn't getting arrested, and passed the sobriety tests. I got a standing ovation from 25 strangers
i just google imaged poop.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
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