I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
Randomize
