glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
jusy threw up in the airport bathroom. I am no longer thankful for fireball.
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
Randomize
