Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
I blacked in at 6:30am on the last stop on the train with a random fedora on? And I'm pretty sure I rode in a limo last night while eating pizza
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
Randomize
