Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Keep in mind that he's 43, unemployed and living with his parents. There's really not much we could do to make his life worse.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Food poisoning on first date... Still rode the mechanical bull like a champ
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
