Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I really have to stop going to the movies high. Spending $10 to not know what the fuck is going on is starting to get pricey.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
