you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Like, he's a nice guy. But he's better at fingering than he is at speaking.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
On the plus side I'm getting really good at painting the inside of a toilet with my bowels.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
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