i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I'm not sure how exactly, but this funeral has turned into a ridiculous night of drinking games
We were showing our tits to everyone because it's breast cancer awareness month and we care deeply
I thought we were doing it cause it's Tuesday
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
I just passed a lady driving with a cat in a sweater sitting on her lap with its paws on the steering wheel
Only you....
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
