It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
I came out of bedroom with my jeans on backwards, zipped AND buttoned. I have inconceivable talents whilst intoxicated.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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