Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
i just opened up my bathroom cabinet to get deodorant and found 4 bottles of natty. Its like the world wants me to miss this interview
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
It's called the dick transitive property. It states if you touch a person whilst they touch a dick, you are also touching said dick.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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