wake up i wanna do it froggy style
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
You were telling everyone in the bar that Jess gave you scurvy.
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