he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
she told me i tasted like america
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
i love that youre following in my footsteps.. pissing yourself on your birthday is an honor and a privlege
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Yeeeaahhh, I'm in no rush to dismiss a level 6 booty-call that pays my bar tabs and understands my Harry Potter obsession.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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