Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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