Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
Little spoons don't ask big questions
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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