Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Randomize