Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
you always know who the new freshman are on fb because theyre always wearing prom dresses
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
