I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
I wish they made helmets for livers.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
I don't want my vagina anymore.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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