Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I woke up at 5 this morning face down on my bed with gummy bears stuffed in my leggings. Yeah.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Ive been home for 20 minutes and I'm already in bed with a vodka tonic
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
He pulled a condom out of his satchel and i questioned my entire life.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Randomize
