The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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