i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to puke in every plant on the whole top floor at the mall without a single person noticing and without missing a step.
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
So I'm drunk playing pool in a bar with a guy I arrested last week for a DUI...if he recognizes me, shit's gonna get real.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Randomize