Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
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