do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
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