Whiskey dick.
Yea dude! Love it. Hate it. Have it.
Everyday of my life.
is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
Apparently I was playing rock paper scissors against myself for 2 hours in the bathroom mirror.
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize