I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
He spent the entire date challenging me to chugging contests.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize
