Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
I'm going to confession for the first time in 6 years. Where do I start, the gay sex or rampant alcoholism?
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
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