I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
i spent an hour trying to convince my psychiatrist that the fact that i showed up for my appointment drunk was progress, and she does not agree
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I was just sitting on the ground alone in fetal position shivering and chewing on my hand when she found me. ecstasy was not my best idea.
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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