I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
