I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Randomize
