I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
No, its ok. Im playing strip pretty pretty princess im currently dueling for the crown
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
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