covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
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