I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
She swung at the pinata with crutches
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
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