remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
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