My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I feel like I got hit by a truck made out of Jack Daniels.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Just letting everyone know that I am still alive after last night. On a related note, this is the 15th "I'm not dead!" mass text I've sent. You've got to celebrate the little things.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
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