is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Im positive, your name was on my abdomen, Im pretty sure thats solid evidence
From russia with love. But also with chlamydia.
I made a list on my phone of places I want to fuck, it's right under my list of groceries I'm getting a little too used to regular sex but dude monogamy is the shit
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
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