Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
I think the pizza guy was in shock..
Well I didn't mean to answer the door only in socks but I mean come on, 4 hours of sex works up an appetite! I WAS RAVENOUS
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
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