she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
It's national "dress up your pet day" come over. Drugs and dressed up cats..it's the shit dreams are made of.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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