when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
When I walked out of the bathroom and you were literally dancing, you looked at me and said 'this is how I dance'. And then continued.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Randomize
