So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I've spent the last ten minutes rubbing glue sticks on the wall
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
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