Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Goddamnit, guys. I got lube all over my kindle.
its like i get a dick upgrade with every new guy i screw, at this rate i'm scared to see my next one
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
