3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
Me and my liver are not on speaking terms.
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