Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
The bachelorette party was all fun and games until the strippers came. AKA you guys.
I apologize for chief "dances with dolphins" sucking on your friends foot
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Randomize