would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
Is it just me or is Michael Jackson blasting throughout the house
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Randomize
