Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
There where 3 half naked girls passed out on the pool table, I crawled under it and just as I was about to go to sleep some guy walks up and says: "dude nice spot" walks away and comes back with a pillow.
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Randomize
