We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I can't believe the cop was so cool about the whole thing, I mean, I had man mayo all over my jeans.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Definitely just said "no homo" to our gay waiter at Cheesecake Factory...our service has steadily declined since.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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