Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I was apparently the best non-Irish person at the party. I wore my skating dress, Austrian flag and a giant shamrock. Everyone is calling me "30 Shots Girl".
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Enjoy the penises
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Randomize
