Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
i was so unappreciative the bar was giving out sweatbands UNTIL I casually used it during sex.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
Someone keeps hanging up bible verse posters in the bathroom stall I masturbate in at work.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize