He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
It's like I paid NJ Transit $33 to suck his dick and go home. Fuck that.
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
I just made a cocktail. Had one shot of vodka left. It looked lonely so I decided to reunite it with its vodka friends in my bloodstream.
Starting the day at 1:44 in the afternoon. With a hot pocket and a mixer. Who knew my life had this kind of possibility.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
