Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
u know how some weekends you just wanna go out and ruin a relationship? this is one of those weekends
It's taken me 5 years and 2 beers to finally realize that maybe he isn't the dude for me. Also, that picking your major should be done sober, lest you find your self an art major.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Just yelled out loud for someone to buy me a drink, 30 seconds later random guy on grindr asks what I'm drinking.
There's a 98% chance your drink will taste like rohypnol
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I know you're on a date and I should leave you alone but about twenty minutes ago I realized I haven't been spanked in years so if you're still looking for a birthday present, you know, consider it.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Randomize
