I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
It'll just be like "PENIS HERE". In case you get lost.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
You started sleep walking, went to my closet, tried to pee on my boots, and when I asked you what you were doing you said "I'm talking to these people about jobs"
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
Randomize
