problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
I need someone to meet me at the end of the road and throw captain morgan at my face like they do with water at marathons
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
He got in a fight. Then called me drunk to see if he should bail his friends out, or walk through a Taco Bell drive-thru. True love.
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
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