its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
i wish there was a 'silent except for booty calls' volume level on my phone
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
I think you begin to realize how unfair life really is when you're high and you discover that the new box of fruit by the foot on your shelf is actually empty
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
So maybe I got drunk and hooked up with him in a hot tub? I mean that's nothing to be ashamed of, that kind of takes talent. I'd drown.
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Randomize