its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
hey did i steal that bike before or after the ball dropped, casue i might have broken my resolution already
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I went on my dinner date pretending that my lunch date didn't jizz in my hair.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
Randomize
